There have been lots of narratives and speculations by various men’s groups as to why a woman would be lacking lubrication during the hour of lovemaking.
Dryness is often a biological issue, and it happens to couples for various reasons, not just the mere “she doesn’t love you.” narrative.
Here are some of the reasons a woman may experience dryness during sexual activity:
Due to contraceptive usage
All family planning methods available in Kenya have side effects, one being getting very dry down there.
Due to Breastfeeding
When your partner is breastfeeding, it may cause vaginal dryness. The prolactin hormone that supports milk letdown also lowers estrogen levels. Hence, the low estrogen reduces natural vaginal lubrication, resulting in severe dryness.
Due to certain medications
Some medications causes your partner to get so dry that you’ll think you’ve landed in the Kalahari Desert. A good example is the use of Accutane for acne treatment, medications like antihistamines, decongestants, cancer treatments, and antidepressants.
Due to Anxiety
Some people get anxious during intimacy and need time to settle down before you judge them for lacking enough feelings for you. Something even men have called “performance anxiety.” Akikuzoea, mambo inakua shwari.
Due to Menopause and Perimenopause Stages
With age, women’s estrogen levels go low, which causes vaginal lining thickness, lubrication, and elasticity to decline. As estrogen drops, the vagina gets drier, which causes friction and pain during sex.
Due to Insufficient Foreplay
When you want to dive in without foreplay, you won’t have a smooth reception. And unless your woman is ovulating, she needs a few minutes of your kisses, sweet words, and caressing to naturally lubricate.
Due to Stress and Fatigue
When your partner has a lot on her mind, it affects her hormones, therefore affecting her “southpark’s” blood flow. So, refrain from stressing her. Unresolved fights or emotional distress will kill desire, leading to dryness.
Due to Excessive Alcohol and Smoking
Smoking restricts blood flow and destroys estrogen levels, while alcohol dehydrates the body and disrupts hormonal balance. Therefore, drying your partner up. So, y’all must slow down.
Due To Trauma and Negative Past Experience
Past traumas, like assault, wire one’s brain to associate sex with fear and violence, which will lead to hesitation, hence the dryness.
Due to various Diseases
Some ailments, like Sjögren’s syndrome, dry the eyes, mouth, and vagina by targeting these cells. Women with it face chronic dryness during sex. Ailments like endometriosis also cause pelvic tightness and poor circulation that will affect lubrication and cause pain. High blood sugar levels/Diabetes also impact vaginal health.
Vaginal Infections and pH Imbalance
Yeast overgrowth and bacterial vaginosis from antibiotics, multiple sexual partners, and or sugars, causes thick discharge that blocks normal lubrication, shifts pH, leading to fishy smells and sexual discomfort.
Hio stuff excess ya white unaona kwa msoloo sio cream-pie ni infection bana 😂
Negative Lifestyle choices
Habits matter more than you realize! What someone eats and drinks will affect their body. Excessive junk food consumption, wearing synthetic material underwear, and using harsh soaps down there will cause imbalance and irritation.
Juu sasa mbona uoshe kanyau na panga soap hadi uingize huko ndani surely? 🤣
So yeah. Vaginal dryness during sex comes from various symptoms, not just low desire. Hormones, stress, health conditions, and emotions all play part
So, What Are the Solutions?
Solutions exist for each problem, from lube to therapy to seeking medical care. You can always address the root causes and enjoy your sessions again.
Just Buy That Lube
It’s not a big deal. Buy online if you’re shy. The commonest one is KY jelly, which works well. There are various other products, like vaginal moisturizers.
Note that water-based lubes are the best.
Don’t stress your person
Most relationships bring a lot of BS, since everyone thinks their social media likes mean everyone wants them… so cut it off and be a good human being. Emotional tension, constant arguments, pressure, or lack of emotional safety will affect how your partner responds sexually.
Seek medical advice
If you notice unusual discharge, both of you need to seek medical evaluation. Otherwise, such infections will keep coming around if only one person is treated. So, wanaume please, meza dawa pia.
Low estrogen is manageable, so see a gynecologist to get a prescription.
Communicate
Watu waongee. Relationships aren’t detention camps. Talk about sex and everything surrounding it openly so that you know where you need to adjust or what to treat.
Lifestyle evaluation
Check what you eat, drink, apply, and generally everything you use on your body. Small lifestyle changes make a major difference.
As a man, you are not blame-free; you also contribute to vaginal dryness. This is primarily through behaviors that hinder a woman’s natural arousal, such as insufficient or zero foreplay, unnecessary stress and pressure, lack of emotional connection, and rushing into intercourse.
Note that our body naturally responds to how safe, relaxed, desired, and emotionally connected we feel.
This is for informational purposes only. For medical advice or a diagnosis, consult a professional doctor.