Nowadays, men are deceiving women for money. Men are the GOLD Diggers. They are breaking desperate women and taking their money.
If you’re not emotionally wise, you will find yourself buying a man a car and paying his loud and violent ‘baby mama’ to “stop harassing you”.
In this list, we’re naming them – the 11 charming dudes you must avoid before you end up confused, drained, or worse in a therapist’s seat for the rest of your life.
1. Dry Beggar
This one will ask you for money without saying it. He is a master of looking gloomy and sad, sighing and clicking dramatically until you hear it.
He drops hints like albums until you ‘gerrit’ and offer to rescue him from the jaws of debt. What an emotional pickpocket! Please walk fast out of his miserable life.
2. Unhinged Borrowers
This one is a walking invoice. He will outright ask you for money within the first week or first month of knowing you with zero hesitation.
From his Uber fare to “emergency business deals” to “forex”, he always has a reason, and you can’t say no because your big head is in love.
He will mostly sugarcoat it with “Ata at least pia mimi ni treatiwe na corporate babe” and “Lemme see how you good can spoil me”
3. Trickster
This one will first marinate you with information on how he has several businesses that are making profits, and show you a “fat” bank account balance. With this, you’ll envision a Billionaire.
Then, Boom! after 1 week, he will have this sad face when you try to kiss him, he’ll wait for you to ask what us wrong, and, Ghafta bin vuu he’ll hit you with “Babe my shipment is delayed at the port and it’s stressing me”, He’ll ask you for a little money of about 980,000k to “clear” this shipment.
LOL, girl, this playbook is so old. I promise you, THAT! will be the last time you see him.
4. The Overgrown Baby
This one needs constant validation from you to do anything. He will never do anything without your contribution. Even if you work until 8 pm, he will be in your house waiting for you to cook and clear the table of the utensils he used at 10 am.
Everything, including the underwear he should wear, is your responsibility… well, apart from him keeping 2 secret families in the next town.
5. The Future Husband (to Someone Else)
This guy will love bomb you, call you “wifey” and “mamaa” within a week, but won’t be ready yet for a “serious thing”.
He will have the audacity to make plans about “your” house and “your” babies. But lo and behold, he’s just keeping you warm while he waits for the woman he actually wants.
You’re basically his emotional dumpster. That’s why they marry the next girl within 5 months of meeting.
6. The Community Husband
This one belongs to everyone. He calls every woman “babe,” so he doesn’t mix up names. His entire roster thinks they’re the main one.
He’s got a wife, a side, and a potential upgrade all running on parallel TLs.
7. The One Who “Almost” Made It
He’s always “almost” rich, “almost” successful, “almost” getting a big government deal. But somehow, bad luck follows him like a shadow. Every month, he’s got a new story about why his millions are delayed… and guess who he expects to support him through his usual “temporary” struggle? Lol
8. The CEO of Excuses
This guy has an excuse for everything. Job hunting? “The industry is rigged.” and “Hakuna ma jobs nowadays” Business idea? “Hio idea haiwezi na hii economy”
He’s got 105 problems, and somehow, YOU are supposed to be his solution. Plus, he won’t show up for the interview you’ll connect him with because something will come up.
9. The Victim
His life is a long-ass tragedy. His exes were “crazy,” his childhood was “so tough!” and his friends “betrayed” him severely. He has been singing this song since you met him.
You’ll spend all your time playing therapist, coddling him mostly for his lack of accountability.
10. The King of Potential
He’s got talent, he’s got dreams, he’s got ideas. The only thing missing? Action. You’ll spend years waiting for him to turn potential into reality, but all he’ll do is keep “working on it” while you fund his daily expenses.
11. The Prince of “No one ever believed in me”
This guy swears no one has ever supported his dreams, apart from YOU. Not a single ex. Not even his elder brother.
Now, you’re his personal cheerleader, financial fire rescuer, and emotional babysitter. He’ll shower you with praise for “believing in him” and “Aki you’re the first to support me like this babe” and “kama sio wewe sijui ningekua wapi” while slowly turning you into his MOM!
If YOU, are still entertaining this kind of person, who is managing to break your heart every Thursday, and give you frequent silent treatment. You’re silly, and you deserve him. Keep him!
Men are not two; there’s alwaaaaaays another one. *rolls eyes”
Nice read 👍😀